My name is Tony. I'm the greatest loser you'll ever know. I'm broke. My wallet has dust on it. I'm unemployed. I'm unemployable. So is my whole family. I don't have my own place. I live with my mom. I can't drive. I can't even ride a bike. I did have a bike-tire parked up my ass-crack, though. I'm still a virgin. I haven't had a girlfriend in 15 years. I've been beat up, arrested, robbed, mauled by animals, stalked, starved, dragged around a parking lot by my own mom's car...You name it. This blog is like religion: just believe it. Everything I tell you is as true as I am stupid.
  • Mom:

    "Do you remember that guy I dated the last time we were here in Alabama?"

  • Me:


  • Mom:

    "That man just walked into the living room, took the remote from you kids, and flicked what you were watching to something else he wanted to watch. I just pointed to the door and said 'Get out.' That was the last time I ever dated a white guy."

  • Me:

    "...that's a good story. You should write that down!"

  • Mom:

    "I'll suck on a lollipop. I'll suck Bonamo's Turkish Taffy. I'll suck on cough drops. I'll suck on-"

  • Me:

    "UM. I...I think I know where you're going with this, so-"

  • Mom:

    "I'll suck on an ice cream cone. I'll suck on BBQ. I'll suck on ANYTHING, but I'll never suck a man's dick. ESPECIALLY a SOUTHERN man's."

  • Me:


Saw this door greeter at the Anniston Walmart.

She was at least 70, and she was so frail and depressed-looking. Her eyes looked like she just “checked out”.

She was just standing in the middle of the entryway, and she was slumped over like a wilted plant, staring at nothing, and she just kept mumbling “Have a nice day-have a nice day-have a nice day…” over and over like a broken record player.

She wasn’t even looking at anybody. She was looking at the ground. And you could barely even hear her.

People coming in: “Have a nice day-have a nice day-have a nice day.”

People going out. “Have a nice day-have a nice day-have a nice day.”

"Have a nice day-have a nice day-have a nice day." is all she was saying.

That lady was broken.

That lady was gone.

Close your mouth because that’s where your cunt is. By

Mom, about Sinead O’Connor.

It was right after I said that I remembered how O’Connor made that open letter to Black America about how, tragic though Trayvon Martin’s death may have been, young Black Americans “ask for it” due to our culture and especially our “violent and negative” music.

"Sing happier and they won’t need to kill you.”

I’m paraphrasing it; she did write some big-ass shit, but that’s what she said in a nutshell.

And a lot of people got mad at her, and rightfully so, by simple virtue of her not being black or American and thus not knowing what the fuck she was talking about.

But instead of getting mad at her, I was thinking about what she said…

Black folks sing violent, angry, and materialistic music (as if that’s all there is to Black America), and so we get treated like shit, right? That’s what O’Connor’s saying. “You used to sing happy things. Go back to that!”


In the 90’s to present we sing Hip Hop and whatever-the-fuck. Get treated like shit.

In the 70’s and 80’s we sang Soul and Funk. Got treated like shit.

In the 50’s and 60’s we sang Motown-style R&B. Got treated like shit.

In the 20’s thru 40’s we sang Jazz and Blues. Got treated like shit.

In the 1800’s we sang Spirituals. Got treated like shit.


Singing about poverty gets us treated like shit. Singing about peace gets us treated like shit. Singing about love gets us treated like shit. Singing about sorrow gets us treated like shit. Singing about faith gets us treated like shit.

And so, just thinking about it, how we sing, think, and act are obviously irrelevant to how other people feel they have the right to treat us.

Indeed, how we sing, what we sing about, and how we act are all, many might say, the result of how other people feel they have the right to treat us.

THEREFOR, based on that shit, all Sinead O’Connor did was shit in her own mouth (and don’t even get me started on racism in Ireland; plenty enough over there for us to not need advice from Sinead O’Connor about how Americans can make the U.S. a more tolerant nation), but you know

ANYWAY, when I told my mom about it, my mom told me what she’d say to Sinead…

Reblogged from lajackash  4,537 notes

Yeah, it’s true. Back before the recession, Asians made more money than White folks did. About $35k/yr more on average, I think, around ‘05 or so. And it was-and probably still is-true that Asians, per person, have/had more people in a particular family unit that each make/made a pretty nice salary, and together that can add up to more wealth in one household than one White person making a great salary, another White family member making a decent one, and everyone else in the family making none.

That is to say, an Asian person and their partner have great jobs and earn altogether $200k a year, versus a White person making as much, but their partner doesn’t, and together they only make $150k a year…

"Asian households make more money than anyone else."

Then again, there’s some real shit to consider here.

ONE: Asians only make up about 5% of America last I checked. They are so little in the population that it’s often hard to find statistics in a graph about where they measure up.

Everyone only cares about how Whites, Blacks, and Latinos are living. That’s how little Asians matter, even though they’re supposedly “privileged”.

Some privilege.

Asians have the money, but not enough of the numbers, power, or influence for Bill O’Reilly to use them as some half-assed example of stating that Asians are the ones who run this society and country (except for maybe the Chinese owning our national debt), and have privilege over White people.

Which leads to TWO: BEFORE the recession, Asians were the highest earners in America. AFTER the recession, America reminded Asians who pays their salary.

Asians USED to make like $170k/yr on average beforehand, but that shit dropped by more than HALF of that AFTER the recession.

BIG ass-kicking right there.

White people? They made like $140/yr on average before the recession, and after?

$113k/yr average.

White people are back on top, just like that! Asians lost at LEAST a whopping $80k/yr out of their average! HALF: GONE!!

White people lost only $20k/yr from theirs. They still make 6-figure salaries on average like their Asian masters used to.

Asians now only make 5 figures a year.

As far as I know, White people still hold the highest income distribution in America, even though there are almost as many minorities altogether in this country as there are White people (a fact which can also probably be used when talking about power and economic distribution in America as well). The latest analysis I remember seeing was an article back in ‘12 or ‘13 about White people on average having a $30k/yr lead on Asian people, and the gap’s been getting wider and worse for most minorities (especially Blacks and Latinos) compared to Whites since the recession, so unless shit’s changed since 2012, then I’ll leave that there.

Needless to say, Latinos make WAY less than either Whites or Asians in this country, followed by Black people.

We’re talking astronomically fucked up yearly averages. 4-figure averages. Like $6,000 a year, ‘n shit.

Because we’re “lazy”. Because living in, and/or being treated like shit in this country isn’t enough of a motivator to do better for ourselves, according to some assholes. We like it! We like being paid $20,000 or less a year for the very same jobs that other people-of coincidentally different race/backgrounds-get paid $50,000 or more a year for, on account of them being, as they want to put it, “not lazy”. This, the same society that also admits that Blacks can’t ever be “really” qualified for higher-earning positions, even if they have the credentials for that position, simply because of our race…

Whatever. Having it both ways is a privilege most of us can’t enjoy. That’s some whole other shit. But my whole point on that is, when you hear people like Pharrell Williams, Ben Carson, Bill Cosby, or Morgan Freeman say race has nothing to do with income inequality-laziness does-and you see “the hardest working race” (Asians, by America’s proof of hard work: income), go from slightly ahead to way far behind “lazier” White people in just a measly 4 years (during a Republican administration), while White people lost the least of their average income distribution (20%), and minorities lost the most (50-65%) during the recession, that kind of destroys that shit-level thinking. Race definitely has something to do with it. I’d even dare say that White privilege, if not outright racism, is what kept White people losing so little during the recession, and what caused Asians to lose so much, and keeps everyone else broke in the first place…

Unless one wants to argue that within a 4-year period, Asians simply got lazier, or White people simply decided to work harder all of a sudden, and that’s what caused all of that unemployment and pay cuts.


But in any event, regardless of who has the most money, there’s that, and then there’s who holds the purse strings that gives the money.

Asian Americans don’t give the money.

Blacks and Latinos don’t give the money.

Minorities don’t have most of the influence and power in Government or Finance or Business or most other shit that makes up power and culture in society. Hell, I don’t even think minorities have most of the money, either. Almost 90% of the top 5% earners in America are White¬†last I checked, so there’s that, too. I rarely see any Asians on the news or elsewhere in any other role other than some kind of supportive one; whether it’s well paid or not, and THAT is what says a lot in my book.*

So let’s not run that game on us, Bill.

My advice, though, is to use Bill’s logic against Bill. He, and people like him, like to say that there’s no such thing as privilege, and that low-income people are that way because they’re lazy.

Here, we have Bill saying Asians are more privileged than White people because they make more money per household, or he’s trying to say that there’s no such thing of privilege based on income-Asian privilege, White privilege, or otherwise-because if Asians aren’t privileged, White people can’t be either (I’m not really sure, though I’d still ask about everything else besides income that goes with privilege, like political power, economy, social rules, culture, etc, which are White-represented…is he ignoring that, too?)…

Me? I’d just tell him that maybe White people have less money and privilege than Asians simply because they are lazier, angrier, and are making excuses for their failures and shortcomings all of the time. Or I’d accuse him of saying White people are lazy. Or ask an Asian to come on the show and do it. It would be some good-ass shit!

At the very least, if income doesn’t have anything to do with privilege, then it doesn’t have anything to do with laziness, either.

"Then what does it, then?"

*That’s the million-dollar question; one a lot of people have an answer to, including Bill, but he doesn’t want to lose his job.


"Hey Tony, ya whiny-ass whiner. How come you ain’t whined your whiny ass nothin’ about you some Ferguson, ya whiny-ass SJW, you?"

Fine. Ya wanna know why?

A LOT of reasons.

First of all, I’m not a “Social Justice Warrior”, I’m a “Social Awareness Whiner”. Fighting this crazy shit doesn’t work; not by yourself, anyway. I’ve been fighting and bitching for a long ass time. So long that I’m fuckin’ tired of it, really.

And I’m not saying that I’m tired of talking about racism and poverty and so on.

I’m not Don Lemon.

I’m just tired of other folks not giving a shit. I’m tired of the apathy. And I’m trying not to be apathetic, myself, in such a way that I’m numb to all the bullshit, as opposed to everyone else just pretending it isn’t happening.

People are just fickle, is all, and their fickleness scares me. They have selective hearing, or whatever. They pick and choose when they want to be outraged, and for how long, when ALL of it is really outrageous and demands full attention.

ALL of it. Somebody in Ferguson, Missouri shouldn’t need to have died in order for people to be outraged about how black people are treated. Even without the police brutality against black folks, or black deaths in general, black folks get treated shitty enough in this country to warrant plenty of protesting and outrage. The discrimination, the poverty, the obstruction, the sabotage, the scapegoating, the utter disregard as fellow human beings or Americans; ALL of it.

And I know, like I said, EVEN I get tired of fighting and speaking about it because nobody cares, so obviously other people get tired of it, too. I get that. Every time we even bring it up nowadays, I’ve noticed black folks having to apologize first.

That’s right. You don’t know how many times I’ve heard somebody say “Now, I don’t mean to sound like a ‘poor me’ black person, but…”

I mean, we have to do THAT, now? We have to apologize for being third-class citizens before we tell people how we already know THEY know how we’re treated?

That’s fucked up. I don’t see women, or gay people, or other minorities having to apologize first before speaking the truth, but people have got black people scared and tired nowadays with the “denial of racism is the new racism” thing, so I get it.

I’m scared and tired too.

But my thing is, Michael Brown got killed, and NOW people are upset.

I’ve been upset for a long time BEFORE that! A LONG TIME.

And, what? HOW he got killed “went too far”?

As opposed to WHAT? IT’S ALL TOO DAMN FAR!


Yeah, at least Ferguson is speaking up about it NOW, right? YEAH, I GUESS SO.

This time people choose to stand up after a LONG FUCKIN’ TIME, in FERGUSON, when it should’ve been happening a LONG TIME BEFORE THAT EVERYWHERE in America.

Hurricane Katrina was THE time to do it, and everyone SLEPT on THAT shit. NOTHING said “Black lives ain’t shit” more than what happened that year, and NOTHING.


Folks were like “…yeah. That’s fucked up. Glad it wasn’t ME, though.” Everybody but Kanye, anyway.


Naw, fuck it. Fuck all of that shit I just said. That’s only part of it. That’s just the critical parts of it. The “Why NOW?” parts of it. With all the other shit that goes on, and how people are being forced to live, and all the denial and shit, I guess I’m, I don’t know, surprised? Ungrateful? Focusing on the wrong shit?

You pick one.

Even though I’m upset that it took this long, and took this death, in order to make people finally get out of the funk, I don’t want anyone to feel like it’s not a good thing that people aren’t letting it go, or that it’s not important for America what’s happening in Ferguson, and all of that.

It’s very good, and very important.

So, it’s like, I’m pissed that it took so long, and I’m happy that somebody’s doing something about it now, but I’m sad that Michael Brown had to die for people to do it, and look; he supposedly stole the cigars, and they lit him up and occupied his town just because he stole some cigars. Unjustified brutality. From what we know, he was unarmed, gave up, and he didn’t kill anybody. They killed him and didn’t even feel like it was a bad or wrong thing. The “Batman Killer” shot up a theater, and he got better treatment, and everyone REALLY thought about THAT shit. Did nothing about it, but at least pretended to dwell on it for a while. My point being, no matter how bad they try to paint the situation about Mike Brown, he, nor the mostly peaceful protesters equal the full militarized force and terrorism (I don’t believe that’s a hyperbolic statement) of a police department (which is more suspect than the suspect was) and National Guard, along with the near-complete apathy of a “colorblind” nation.

That is without a doubt. Look: I’m an open-minded individual. Diversity of opinion and questioning before believing are great, and all that, but anyone who tries to say the punishment of Brown and protesters of Ferguson “fits the crime”, then yeah, you are racist and a hypocrite.

Simple as that. The point of America is that you are supposed to want the same rights and freedoms for others, even for the people you don’t like, that you’d want for yourselves. What’s happening in Ferguson would be considered “another Waco” if it were a predominantly white town. In fact, I think what happened to that rancher guy had all the Civil Liberties nuts all fired up and ready to go, but they are silent about a town getting occupied by a militarized police state over some petty shit. Because it’s a black town.

Racism and hypocrisy.

I know a guy here in Anniston. A restaurant owner. A PROMINENT restaurant owner. Of probably the most popular restaurant in Calhoun County, AL. The one I threatened violence upon once, because I don’t like the way he treated my sister, or me, or his workers, or people, and so I’m most certainly banned from his establishment, and that’s all okay and besides the point, right?

Well, this asshole actually thought he was so much “the shit” that he got pissy and punched a cop!


Because he felt like it, and because he could. And he beat that cop’s ass.

Then he ran, and went to another restaurant, and cops were there waiting to arrest him, and guess what?

He still was “the shit”, and fought THEM, TOO!

And you know what? USUALLY, on TV and such, when people fuck with people, that’s ONE thing, but when people fuck with COPS, that’s quite another!

Usually you get brutalized. Sometimes you end up dead.

If you’re black. Mike Brown took some cigars. That other lady supposedly got beat to a pulp for “looking high”. Other people “looked dangerous” and are dead.

This guy is not black. He didn’t get beat down or killed by the cops for actually attacking cops and being dangerous, he just got “subdued”. He got processed. He got bail. He got a court date.

What he didn’t have to get, though, was a trial.

As a matter of fuckin’ FACT, NOTHING happened.

It disappears completely from the news!

In March ‘13, his stupid ass beat up some cops. In April, he walks out of jail and gets a court date. In MAY?

NOTHING. Even though it was a felony, and even though he committed misdemeanors along with that felony, and even though he had priors, NOTHING HAPPENED.

It ain’t till many months later do we see this asshole in the news.

He’s opening a new restaurant in another town to expand his franchise, and he couldn’t be happier, and neither could the town and its cops be any happier for him!

What happened? WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED? Is he still waiting to get tried in court for his felony and danger to society? I don’t think so. He’s free and happier than a muthafucka. The news just glosses it over. The town just glosses it over. I’m like the only asshole who even remembers and cares, because a black man got ran over by a white woman in a BMW in Quintard, and she’s not being charged either.

But I get banned from Walmart for a couple of years, without due process, for “looking like I might be a criminal”, and my sister gets a gun pulled on her in a Burger King bathroom because she “fit the description” of a suspect, and my mom gets pulled over for being suspected of “riding dirty” because they think she’s “German”, which around here seems to mean “white nigger” to these people.

We got stories. A LOT of stories.

And, y’know, MOST BLACK FOLKS HAVE STORIES of disrespect and discrimination and fear; not of what people might do to us, but ARE doing. My friend Laz talks about how he keeps receipts from his stops so that he always has an alibi, and I just don’t go out at all if I don’t have to, because my family and I have been through and seen enough shit in our day to know that help ain’t coming and we know better. That’s not a normal, “free” way to live, but it’s how people are forced to in this country, simply because of race.

And so, obviously, YEAH, Ferguson is correct when they are saying that the police in general overreact about back people. They aren’t the only ones who do that, but that’s what we’re focusing on at the moment, and we should be, and it is a race thing and it is causing a lot of unnecessary shit.

SCARY shit. ANGRY shit.

So, yeah. I’m upset, I’m grateful, I’m sad, I’m scared, I’m hopeful; you name it. I even hope people heed Ferguson, no matter their race, and start making this a bigger thing. I hope that the Civil Rights movement, long overdue, starts up again. I hope that even that becomes a part of something bigger that’s also long overdue. At the very least, I hope some things about our police force changes, and repairs the rifts between it and black people. And that carries with it its own set of obvious fears, the most of which being that people get tired too quickly, or get scared too much; something that I’ve been trying hard not to do, myself, as I said.

That, and I hope President Obama stops “not saying shit”. I’ve already heard the arguments on why Obama can’t say shit, won’t say shit, or will say shit, but not the shit that needs saying. I kind of get why, but it isn’t right, and does nobody any good playing politics with racists just because “Obama has to represent ALL Americans”. That’s like saying Obama shouldn’t say anything about rape victims because he has to represent the rapists, too. It’s bullshit, but of course that’s probably what’s going to happen, because at the very bottom of priorities in this country is black people.

What else is new? But that doesn’t make it right, and I hope that the “What else is new?” mentality stops and we start making ourselves a priority, for each other, if not for America.

But there you go. In a nutshell, the reason why you all haven’t heard me say anything about Ferguson isn’t because I have nothing to say about it, but because I have too much to say. And I usually have a lot to say about a lot of fucked up things, and nobody usually cares, so I guess I didn’t see how it would make a difference this time, and it probably doesn’t, except to say to you all that I’m not ignoring it here in my shitty-ass house, I just wasn’t saying anything about it here on Tumblr.

Also, there are plenty of other folks on Tumblr and Twitter and the news who are doing a way better job that I’ll ever do or need to do on the subject, are more up to speed about what’s going on, and nobody speaks about what’s happening about Ferguson or for Ferguson than people in Ferguson, so what do you need me to say shit for?

…bet you kinda wished you never wondered, huh?